Grief

The Journey

 

We are all on a journey. Better health. New career. Love and loss. Often we are so focused on moving that we don’t stop to appreciate the moments. The death of our son Noah altered the course of my life in profound ways. It is the kind of loss you never get over, but over time, grief compelled me to live differently, to learn more about myself and to focus on this moment rather than rethinking yesterday and stressing about tomorrow. 

Appreciating moments is just one of Noah’s gifts to me. He has taught me so many things. I could easily have been consumed by grief, and in the beginning I could not have imagined I would ever smile again, let alone live a fuller life, more present and aware of the blessings all around me. But thanks to the love and support of family, the insight and guidance of an amazing grief therapist, the wisdom shared by my coach and the special friends who sat with me in the darkness and helped guide me toward the light, I continue to grow.

Today I am healthier, more creative and more fully present. I am grateful for the journey. Of course I would give anything to have my son back, but since that is not an option, I live my life more open and aware, grateful for the lessons he has taught me.


Shared Experience

 

On Mother’s Day morning I organized a gathering of some other women I know who have lost children. They all said the same thing…my husband won’t talk about it…he won’t see a therapist…he won’t acknowledge Mother’s Day…

It was interesting. Every story is different. Those who lost children through illness are different than those who lost children in an accident…those who lost children in a car accident are different than those who lost kids to a drug overdose…or in the military.

Of course, there is no better way to lose a child.

I feel like I have collected so many stories, each with it’s own sad but compelling set of facts and circumstances. And yet each of us feel we were uniquely “touched.” Even death has a community, but it is a community in which each of us feels alone.